Windshield Wipers

I think I'm getting old. When I was a kid, rubber duckies and brightly colored rain coats made me happy on rainy days. My dad just bought and installed new windshield wipers and I am SO EXCITED! I think that might be a sign of... maturity? Next, I'll get a kick out of coupons and good insurance rates. This is bad... I think I'll go home a play with some rubber duckies in mud puddles.

Pop-eye

Pop-eye is a strange character. He has abnormally large forearms. And I don't think Pop-eye gets so amped up purely on spinach. There must be something else in there. Also, he appears to have some sort of jaw tumor that causes a speech impediment. I'm surprised he stays with Olive Oyl after she falls for that burly guy every time. You would think he'd figure out that she can't be trusted. But... the spinach always makes it better. When I was a kid, I ate spinach because I wanted to be able to fly. I wanted to be able to pull trees out of the ground with one hand and sink ships with my fists. Of course, I was always disappointed about the results that followed my eating spinach. My blood iron increased ever-so-slightly. That's it. I was still a forty pound, scrawny kid. It's sad.

Candy

I love candy. It's wonderful. Small pieces of sugary heaven.... yum. Among my favorites are: Sour patch kids, jujifruits, ginger chews, raspberry dollars, lindor truffles, cadbury fruit and nut chocolate bars, skor bars, strawberry twizzlers, razzles, reeses, and rock candy. This is just the beginning. I might need to go to candy rehabilitation. I have issues. I might have to nurse these issues with a candy bar.

Wordle... sweet

Monday

Mondays suck. I do not like them. It's such a dreadful day. I think... damn... four more days of this?! It's Monday. I don't feel like blogging. Mondays are not for blogging. Mondays are for crying and wallowing in self-pity.

Wisdom Teeth

I got my wisdom teeth out. It hurt. My head is throbbing. I can feel a heartbeat in my jaw. It's not a pleasant heartbeat, either. It's a knife heartbeat. Perhaps I'm being dramatic. It's not a knife. It's more like a hammer. Does that sound more realistic? Anyway, I feel like crap. And I would love a cheeseburger. But... yogurt for me. Woohoo.

Homework

Homework should be banned as an illegal substance. But...who would use homework as a substance? That is just stupid. Nobody wants to get high off homework. It's like getting high off dead puppies and broken dreams. Well... homework should be illegal just because it SUCKS! If I am ever a teacher, which believe me, is never going to happen, I am NEVER assigning homework.